Saturday, June 28, 2008

Sunday Randoms

To the guy behind me at the DQ drive-thru: I was waiting for my change, a-hole, so lay off the horn, would ya? I was stopping for a much-needed chocolate cone to help relax me after a stress-filled day, so thanks a lot for adding to my foul mood. Just what I needed. Jerk.



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A big thank you to the guy at Schnuck's that 'well-helloooo'ed' and winked at me today. Maybe not classy, but seeing that only happens once or twice a year anymore (and that's being generous), I'll take it.



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I just finished reading The Other Boleyn Girl. I LOVED IT. It was so good. I highly recommend it. I liked it just as much, if not more, than another book I read recently and really enjoyed, Pillars of the Earth. These are both books that I would not normally pick up on my own, but after much persuading decided to give a try, and I couldn't put either down once I started them. Excited after reading the book, I rushed right to Blockbuster to rent TOBG movie and was very disappointed. It's a fairly large book, so I realize they couldn't include everything, but the movie seemed so empty. If it wasn't for me feeling vested in the people in this powerful story I had just read, I don't know that just by watching the movie I would've cared what happened to them. But I will say, after reading this book, I can't get enough of Tudor History. There's endless info on-line, and it's addicting. If you haven't read this book, please do. You won't regret it.

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I did it. I was "that person" at step class the other day. I fell. UGH...I FELL. I'm so bad at paying attention. Once I get comfortable with the steps, I'll find myself going over my to-do list or running down my grocery list. We were doing these reverse step maneuvers...everything was going just fine when reversing back the heel of my foot just caught the edge of the step and DOWN I went. Of course when I went down I was half on, half off the thing and the step made this loud clatter against the risers. Luckily I wasn't hurt. My pride was a bit bruised, but other than that, no marks to show for it. That'll teach me to check my lists at the door.

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I got a new minivan a few weeks ago (Honda Odyssey EX-L RES in Deep Cherry Pearl...LOVE IT!). I got my first scratch on it and darn it I DID IT! ARGH! I was leaving Sam's and pulled the cart up to the back of the van so I could unload the kids and goods, when I noticed it got a little too close to my back bumper. So I tried to edge it away carefully when it just moved the wrong way and made this horrible sound against the bumper. It happened so fast, I dont' know what the h*ll I did, but I stewed over it off and on all day. I was wondering...do I get it fixed...ask for touch-up paint to do it myself? It's so small, I know I'm being crazy over such a small scratch that probably no one else will notice. But you know how it is when you get a new car...I've been washing it every weekend, actually carrying our crap in every day - where in my old van you could always count on several empty Diet Coke cans, straw wrappers, candy wrappers, forgotten toys, barretts, you name it. Sigh. I'm sure this is the first of many scratches to come, so I guess I'll let it go for now. Sniff.Sniff.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Wanted: Happy Medium

Penis is a big word in this house, and all too often on display. Why must kids be so obsessed with privates and poop? It's all bobo's and poo. It's the reason for many sitdown discussions with the kids (SA in particular). Finally...why now, who knows...but finally the "your-penis-is-your-private-area" talk finally made an impact.

But it's starting to snowball...

Now the boy who was so proud to show his boyhood has taken it to a new level. AR was waiting her turn outside the bathroom...creeping in impatiently, as is a constant occurence here, SA starts shouting, "Get out! Don't look at my penis! It's my private area! Get out!!" Then tonight when they were all getting their jammies on he starts crying, shouting, "Oh no! Now everyone's going to see my bobo! They're going to see my private area!" Sigh.

Poor kid. I know it's confusing. You throw all these rules at them, but they're all accompanied with 'but when's'.

Maybe mom needs a book. I need help on dealing with these questions. Oy.

Monday, June 23, 2008

My "Pool Boy"

Big Bald Guy at the Gym.

That's what I called him. A nice piece of.............eye candy. What inspires me to go to the gym? That Louis bag that is so close, so close - AND - that bald, beautiful trainer with the Carpe Diem tattoo on his calf. YUM-MY.

Okay, I don't go to the gym TO SEE HIM, but it sure doesn't hurt. The guy is sex on legs. I just don't know how else to describe him. The big muscles, the tight "Trainer" shirt, the bald head, gi-normous tat on his leg...the guy's just sexy. He just looks like a bad boy...like...... Okay, I'll stop. RD told me that himself when, yes, I was telling my dear, good-humored husband about the decor (a.k.a. personnel) at the gym.

The problem (not the obvious 34-year old mother ogling the very-early-20-something-year old boy at the gym) is that today while working out, he was working out beside me. I got the unfortunate privilege of hearing him speak. Hearing the 20-something things come out of his mouth to his buds at the gym...the sexy facade is gone. Gone. Darn it. Darn it. Darn it.

LOUIS! LOUIS! LOUIS!

Time Well Spent

Daddy's on vacation. Need I say more? It's wonderful getting to spend time together as a family. It's wonderful having someone to...ahem...sort of share the everyday responsibilities. It's great having RD around in the evenings to play cards with me. Here comes the big BUT...

Let's just say RD's patience runs a bit thin. And when daddy's crabby, everyone's crabby. Being the primary caregiver, primary disciplinarian...you know what works - or at least try to fake it pretty well. When you're with the kids 24/7, you learn to pick and choose your battles. Is the boys shrieking loudly while they play hide and seek getting on my nerves? You betcha. But you can also bet I find those deliriously happy screams a lot more tolerable than the deliriously angry screams of boys sitting in time out because they wouldn't play quieter. I can list a 101 more examples, but you get the idea. RD is picking at every little thing the kids do.

We were out shopping for a rug (with three kids in tow...who's crazy now?) when RD kept flipping out because the kids wouldn't stay RIGHT-AT-OUR-SIDE. I made a snippit to RD about him needing to keep his temper under control, when I realized I could stand to pick my battles more wisely myself.

It's only a week. It's only a week.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

My How Time Flies

I was bored - or a better way to describe it was...looking for anything other to do other than the obvious (clean, laundry, etc.) - and was playing around on the computer, when I decided to pull up my ole' blog and read back on some of my old entries.

I started it in '04, but man, reading some of those old stories it seems like decades ago. It made me glad to have all those stories in writing. Funny stories of old neighbors, friends, and best of all, silly things my kids did in their first 2 years. It's amazing the things you forget.

I was quoting to RD the things we'd said to each other, the funny things our kids did (and some of the not-so-funny), and reminding him of our crazy neighbors that lived across the street from our old house. He, like me, had forgotten so many of those details you'd think would just stick. But they don't. Some things make you laugh, some make you cry, some make huge impacts in your life, some are forgotten before the day is through - whatever the story of the day is, it's priceless being able to look back and remember when.

I had so many "my children are so wonderful" stories and an unbelievable amount of "I've got the best husband in the world" stories. I was telling him about the latter and he said, "Gee thanks." I asked him why he said that, and he responded, "Well you say that like you can't believe you ever said that." It's not that...it's just...our marriage has its ups and downs like any other, it just made me smile to read so many positive things about him, us, our kids. It made me look at where we are today and appreciate things just a bit more.

Life gets so crazy you forget to do what really matters. At least I do. I need to get down on the floor and play with my kids more. I need to stop saying "In a minute" EVERY time one of my kids tries to get my attention. It's so hard, but I need to try.

Have you heard that new Trace Atkin's song, "You're Gonna Miss This?" It gets me every time. It's so true. All the craziness that goes on everyday...the good, the bad, the ugly...all of it...there's going to come a day when I'm going to miss this.

Reading back on those old entries of when they were babies, I already do.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Just Breathe

Am I a bad mom? I tell ya...some days I really feel like it. I do my best. I really do. I start my day with all the best intentions, but then they start screaming, whining, crying, hitting...and all my good intentions go out the window. I have prided myself in being a patient mom. A mom who listens. Who thinks before she reacts. Some days I am successful. Other days...I'm waiting for a neighbor to knock on my door to ask if everything's okay.

I think my kids are good kids. I do. But even the best of kids have horrible moments. Unfortunately some days have more moments than others. Some of those moments are...GASP...in public...in front of...GULP...witnesses. Before having kids I remember seeing other people's children have tantrums in public. I did what, let's face it, what most people do...watch and listen to see how "the mom" is going to handle it. Sure you try not to look like you're watching/listening, but it's hard not to when World War 3 is going on right in front of you. I would think two things, 1) My kids will NOT act like that in public. They will know better, and 2) If I was that mother I would have handled that totally different. Well...as I said, that was before I had little monsters of my own. I say monster in the most loving way. Like I said, my kids are good kids. Viewing other kids I often think, "Wow...my kids are so much better behaved than their's." Sounds awful I know, but you get so much negative as a mom, sometimes you gotta throw yourself a bone. As I often do...I'm getting off track.... let's just say I've eaten my words. I handle each moment the best I can. And of course the way you deal with something at home is almost always going to be different than how you would handle something in the middle of say Target or Home Depot. I wonder how many future mom's I've encountered while braving the stores with my three children - how many of these women said to themselves, "I so wouldn't have handled that that way" or "what a brat!" To these women...you just wait.

What's prompted me to post an entry after how many months? I'm tired. Exhausted. At my wit's end. Over-f-ing-whelmed. Maybe it's because it's summer...maybe things will get better once preschool starts again, but I feel like my role as mother has been replaced with the role of Referee, they do nothing but fightfightfight; and let's not forget housekeeper, cook, social coordinator, driver, and wife (you know what wifely duties I'm talking about). I'm spent. I complain to my husband and his basic response is that "don't you think I'm tired?" or something along the lines of "you're doing what every other mom has to do...what makes you different?" He totally misses the point. I'm not saying he doesn't work hard. I know he does, but that doesn't take away from what I do. And I'm not saying I'm the only overworked, underappreciated mom/wife out there. No I'm not in a unique situation, but that doesn't make life any easier.

I love my life...it's just...so damn hard sometimes.