Decent Proposal

As I've written before, I'm fed up with my post-baby figure. I'm tired of not having any clothes that fit me right. I'm tired of wearing my "temporary" wardrobe, which consists of several ill-fitting elastic-waist pants and jogging suits. I try to eat good and exercise regularly, but I just haven't found much motivation. I don't have any upcoming events that I'm wanting to look good for, and I'm not so grossly unfit that I'm in a desperate position. I need something to inspire me. I need to really want to look (and feel) better. Everybody wants to look better - that's not enough anymore.

I am in serious need of clothes; but who wants to go shopping when everything looks so bad on me? What fun is it to look for a shirt that will camouflage my new post-baby pooch, or look for pants that help hide my saddle bags? Not my idea of a good time.

I came up with a solution. I approached RD with my proposition:

Me: I've got a proposition for you.
RD: This can't be good.
Me: No, listen. It's not bad.
Silence
RD: Go on. I'm listening.
Me: It's no secret I'm overweight right now. I've been sort of good, but I know I can be better. I'm just not motivated.
RD is cooking up some squash for the babies...but I can tell he's listening.
Me: I need something to work towards. Other than just feeling good and looking better, I need a reward - a goal to work towards.
RD looks up to me with a look in his eyes that says to get to the point.
Me: How 'bout...when I get to my goal weight, I get to go on a $500 shopping spree to get new clothes for my new body.
RD who hates spending money at any cost is giving me a look that doesn't look too promising.
Me: Just think...I'll feel better about myself, which will make me happier. You like me thinner. You know you do. And, let's face it, if I'm feeling better about myself...if I'm feeling sexier, you get more sex out of it. It's a win-win situation.
Waiting for him to say something...waiting...waiting...
RD: What's your goal weight?
Me: Well...I have a goal weight and a goal-goal weight.
RD: No...NO...you're already cheating! You can't have two goal weights!
Me: Yes I can. I have my realistic goal weight; and then there's my probably-not-gonna-happen goal weight...but I'd like to try.
RD: When do you get the money? At your goal weight or your "goal-goal" weight. Rolling his eyes.
Me: At my goal weight.
RD: No...I think you should get it at your goal-goal weight (Again, rolling his eyes). What is it BTW?
Me: I haven't weighed my goal-goal weight since we met, that will take forever. If I get to my goal weight, I'll need a lot of new clothes anyway. And...I'm not telling you my goal weight. I don't want to tell you how much I weigh.
He knew my pre-pregnancy weight...he knew how much I gained. I'm just ashamed I guess that I haven't lost more. This way of thinking doesn't make sense, I know, but I know I'm overweight. I know that he knows I'm overweight, but somehow saying the number out loud...I just didn't want to do it.
RD: If you get to your goal-goal weight. Go on your shopping spree.
Me: When I get to my GOAL weight I will.
I give him my biggest smile and walk away. VICTORY. lol

So...today was my first official day. I had Raisin Bran for breakfast. I walked the treadmill for 20 minutes, did some curls with my weights, and I did some leg lifts. I had a med.-size bowl of chili for lunch...no cheese. I had a much smaller bowl than I would have any other day, and to my surprise I was full. I'm chugging the water...which isn't really my thing, but I'll give it a shot.

Let's hope I can stick to it this time. I could really use some new clothes. ;)