It is so wonderful having RD home. He has been helping out so much. He's helping at every feeding, playing with the kids all day, reading to them, putting them down to sleep...AND here's the kicker....are you ready? He's been cleaning!!!!! Whoa! Stop the presses! LOL
I was sitting back on the couch relaxing, watching RD feed the babies some Zucchini (they're loving their veggies BTW!!), and my heart was so filled with love. We've always had a great relationship - I had a tremendous love for him when we married, but there's something about watching him as a dad. Seeing him make silly faces, talk in that high-pitched voice, down on his hands and knees with them playing on the floor...to me that's more romantic than any story in a silly novel you could pick up. He is such a wonderful father. I am so proud of him. I'm tearing up just writing this...my goodness. I would have the same love and respect for him as a father regardless of my screwed-up upbringing, but having such a messed up family, it makes me have that much more appreciation for him and everything he does - for me and the kids. You've heard me bitch about my mother, well my father is...was an alcoholic, absentee father. The "was" is from his sudden desire to make up for lost time. I'll have to unleash that here some other day.
...forget that, where were we? :) Not only have I been blessed with three wonderful children, it's renewed my love for my husband.
I've made a lot of f*ck-ups in my life, and have made a bad habit of blaming my parents for everything I've done wrong. Attributing all of my bad characteristics to my lousy childhood...if only my parents had done this or that...and so on. One thing my husband has taught me is to be accountable for myself. I need to stop using my parents' "lack of parenting" as a crutch for all the areas in my life that are f*cked up. This sounds so cliche, but RD has truly made me a better person. Sure a lot of it is me finally growing up, maturing finally, but I really do not think I would be the person I am today without him.
Okay...this is starting to get too mushy, and I'm embarassing myself! I've been in a great mood these past several days, and I guess you're just going to have to put up with it for awhile! :)
