Designed to Sell

There's one special skill all mothers excel at. I'd bet you'd be hard-pressed to find a mother that didn't rock at this.

MULTI-TASKING

Men on the other hand...

Our new realtor was coming at 10 a.m. this morning. We got the bulk of things done lastnight - RD polished the hardwood floors (on his hands and knees, people!), painted the shop room in the basement and I worked on cleaning up everything else (scrubbed all the tiles in the kitchen, the cabinets, the stove, the pot rack above stove, cleaned up carpet stains, put tall piles of laundry away, put away random junk) - there was still some small things to do this morning. I had a plan - we'd first take turns taking showers and getting dressed while the other person watched the kids, then we'd work together (again, still one watching the kids) to get the duvet cover out of the dryer and put on the bed, the dining room table cloth found (in basement somewhere) and put on, bring the ficus tree up from basement and put back in dining room (it "makes" the room, but we removed it b/c the kids kept getting into the moss and pulling off the leaves), vacuum the bedrooms, and move the wine rack into the dining room, as well as some other minor things.

First I took a shower, then came out so RD could take a shower. He said he'd take one later, he first wanted to get some things done - he then escaped down to the basement. I thought he was just going down to bring something up or get something out of the dryer, but suddenly it was 9 a.m. and he was STILL down there.

Me: yelling down to basement RDDDD!! Are you almost done? You still need to take a shower yet...and we need to ____ and ____ and _____ still.

RD: Yep...I'll be right up.

He came up about ten minutes later. After some nagging on my part, he vacuumed the bedrooms, then took a quick shower, THEN WENT BACK TO THE BASEMENT!!!!!!!!!

I quickly changed the kids and put them down for their nap. I rushed downstairs to try and speed things up. I grabbed the duvet cover out of the dryer and started looking for the table cloth. All the while, RD is tidying up the shop room shelves. Not really looking like he's doing anything, just moving stuff around.

Me: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Do you really think Tina (realtor) is going to care if that damn shelf is tidy? Will you PLEASE help me? It's almost quarter to ten!

RD: Yea, yea...let me just finish this?

ME: PLEASE, RD. Take this (duvet cover) upstairs and put it on the comforter. I also need you to bring up the ficus tree and move the wine rack back into the dining room.

RD: Okay...okay...I'm going.

I go up and put away all the toys and move the bigger toys to the side walls to try and get them out of the way. I put the table cloth on the table then went to wipe down the bathroom sink and empty the trash. Noticing all the little finger prints on the front screen door, entertainment center, and tv, I grabbed some Windex and cleaned that up. Not seeing RD anywhere, I go in and get the wine rack and lug it into the dining room. I peeked into the bedroom...no duvet cover. Just as I headed towards the basement stairs I see RD coming in (he was cleaning up some tools he had on the back deck).

RD: I was just going down to get it!

Me: Forget it...I'm getting it. Hey...don't forget the ficus tree!

Just in time, (ah-hem) we got everything done and in place. So as you can imagine, I was all flushed from rushing around, while RD was calm as can be - as he had spent the entire morning moving crap around on the shop table. I'm sure he did more than that, but for the life of me I couldn't tell ya.

It seems most mothers you talk to feel like they have the weight of the world on their shoulders. RD is a great dad...incredible! Yet...it's a lot of the little things he slips on. After asking him to grab something out of the kids' room for me, I saw him wandering from one side of the room to the other, completely lost. Our kids are over a year old and he still doesn't know where anything is. How is that? It's a small room! There are three drawers and one cubby - take a look around! When I tease him about it, his response is usually something like, "You're the mom...moms are supposed to be good at this stuff/know this stuff/be more patient/be better at this or that" Riiigggghhhht. No pressure.

As for the new realtor. Love her! LOVE.HER. She brought an assistant with her who took notes on every detail of the house. We talked about what should stay, what should go, price, timing issues, etc. Her confidence was catching. She gushed over how wonderful our house is and if I were a prospective buyer, I'd be sold! Again, loved her!

Next step is to get an inspection. The town we live in is really strict, so she offered up some tips on things we should do before they come. They were very minor, quick fixes, so we should have those things done in the next couple days.

Remember the big news I mentioned? I've got nothing to share just yet. But first I wanted to say it's nothing exciting. I guess I made it sound grander than it is. I should've said it's a big deal to us, but it will be rather boring to everyone else. I'm not pregnant, no big life decisions have been made - it's nothing like that. It's just something that involves someone else in our family, so even though I'm 99.999999999% sure no one in our family reads this blog (so help me God if they ever do), I still fear of them reading something on here before they hear it from us.

I hope you all have a wonderful week! Until next time...

Dust in the Wind

Who would've thought such everyday tasks would be kicking my ass like this. The laundry, all the little get-the-house-ready-to-sell projects, the dishes, everything...it's just so damn overwhelming sometimes.

I need to get my butt up and start doing something. I need to polish the furniture, but I can't find the Pledge, so that's my excuse at the moment. I just keep sitting here staring out the window.

The kids will be up from their morning nap soon, so I guess there's no point in starting anything now. Right? Okay, you talked me into it. I'll just put it all off until this afternoon's nap. Great idea! Thanks!

Have it Hootie's Way?

Anyone else find the new Burger King commercial a tad creepy? It's like some crazy, sexed-up, Fun House freak show...then you throw in Hootie (Darius Rucker...whatever, he'll always be Hootie to me)...it's just too weird.

But there's a little part of me that's starting to like it...hmmmm....

St. Patrick's Day Randoms

Remember the dumpster we rented? Well, in an effort to help beautify our neighborhood (and in turn making our house more sellable!), RD told the neighbor catty-corner to us that he could use our dumpster to get rid of some stuff if he'd like. Said neighbor was very happy to hear this and told RD he'd be taking him up on the offer. As you can imagine, we were thrilled because we've been staring at this stuff for close to four years now. I woke up this morning, look across the street, and what do I see? The neighbor directly across the street must've seen his neighbor hauling this stuff to our dumpster and decided he wanted it. Now instead of it being catty-corner to us, it's right out front. GRRRRRRRRRRR.

RD and I have been hemming and hawing over whether or not to get the boxed bay window in the master bath for the new house. It's only $1,600 - and I say "only" because in the grand scheme of things it just doesn't seem like that much - but we KEEP SAYING THAT. It didn't seem like much to add the window in the kids' bath, the crown molding in the dining room, the open stairwell to the basement, the extension to the deck, the pedestal sink in the powder room...I could go on and on. See where I'm going with this? We've added so many seemingly "little" things, we're now close to $30,000 more than what we had planned on spending. We're thinking we're going to make a good profit on this house and it looks like we'll be getting some money from RD's aunt's (who recently passed away) estate, but we still need to furnish this place. My belly's turning just thinking about it. Ugh. The way we deal with things is through humor. Our latest saying has been (to say with a shrug), "What's money?!" Usually followed by nervous laughter. Sure we might not have furniture for this big house, but damn it's going to be nice!

RD pointed out something that made me hang my head in shame. And for him to say ANYTHING regarding my weight or eating habits...you know it's got to be bad. I've been eating non-stop lately. I've been lucky in that I haven't gained any weight, but at this rate it's just a matter of time. I don't know what my deal is! I just can't stop! I was doing so well for so long, but it's all been shot to hell. You know what the problem is? The kids are now eating real food...table food. What do they love? Cheese. Mama loves cheese, too. And Bologna...and pancakes...and chicken nuggets. Then I get this attitude that if I've already been bad today, I might as well go all out. I ran to Target lastnight and thought, "What the hell?! I might as well get some Reese's Peanut Butter cups!" Knowing I was spinning out of control, I ate them before I got home. I even hid the wrapper in my purse so RD wouldn't see. What's the matter with me?! I was doing so great and was just getting ready to buy a smaller pair of jeans and VOILA! I didn't just fall off the wagon I leaped off! I've soooo got to so something about this. I just don't care enough yet to do it. Bleh.

RD's mom is home. She's going back to work Monday and we've agreed to drive her to work as often as possible. We've got something big in the works....but I don't want to dish about it here just yet. I'll spill as soon as things are more final...maybe Monday?

Until then...Happy St. Patty Day to ya!

I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying

FINALLY! FINALLY! FINALLY!

I have had this song in my head for so long. I've been humming it, making ill attempts to sing it, but no one could tell me the name or singer of the song. I knew Sting did back-up for it...which was my favorite part...now I've finally put technology to use, and found my song!

You should take a listen (#9)...

"I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying" by Toby Keith* and the wildy sexy Sting

*The irony being that I kept telling RD that the singer sounds like Toby Keith...but for whatever reason I didn't think it was him.

I've got nothing to say

It's been a crazy week and I'm physically and emotionally drained. RD's aunt died (actually it's his grandma's sister) several days ago. My SIL called RD's mom to tell her about her dying and MIL was all confused. She didn't know what day it was and she had a large bump on the back of her head. We live only five minutes away from her, so RD rushed over and took her to the hospital. They're pretty sure she had a seizure. She used to have them pretty regularly when RD was little, but it's been something like 20 years since she's had one. They're sending her home with some meds and have instructed her not to drive for six months - which I can tell you right now is going in one ear and out the other. She's got a very stressful job that runs her ragged, and there's no way she's going to miss any more work than she sees necessary.

It seems the seizures she had years ago were brought on by stress, so it's highly likely this job she so loves is probably the primary cause of this latest episode. Now RD and his sisters are making it their mission to talking her into a less stressful position. I don't see them succeeding, but we shall see.

That's all I've got. I guess I did have something to say.

Now I'm off to eat some Girl Scout cookies. Those damn Girl Scout cookies!

Give the boy an A for effort!

We were breathing heavy, caught up in the moment, pulling our clothes off as fast as we could. I moved on top of him, kissing his chest, smiling as he moaned in anticipation. Then I leaned back, he sat up...*insert some crazy repositioning here*...

Me: Um...honey. I don't think this is going to work.

Awkward silence.

Me: I've...um...seen this in the movies...but I don't think it really works.

Clumsily move back into a safe position.

LESSON OF THE DAY: Don't believe everything you see in the movies.

Our house, that was where we used to sleep

I've had second thoughts about the realtor we met with the other day. I was really impressed with her on-line bio. She had some raving testimonials - and for what it's worth, she looked very polished and professional in her photo.

First gaffe was she was 30 minutes late. She did call first, but it was definitely not a good start. When she did arrive, I was admittedly very disappointed in her appearance. I expected a polished professional to walk in our door. You know, the one in the picture? In her photo, she had beautifully-styled, shoulder-length, blonde hair; and she was wearing what looked to be a nice suit. Stylish, not too stuffy. Her hair showed signs of once being blonde - it was dark brown, still shoulder-length, with blonde tips. I couldn't hold back saying SOMETHING.

Me: nervous laugh I almost didn't recognize you with the darker hair. You were blonde in the picture, so I didn't think that was you walking up.

Realtor: laughing Oh, yes! I was blonde. I just had a baby in October, so I stopped coloring my hair while I was pregnant. I've gotten so many compliments with my hair being darker, I decided just to keep it.

No, they're just trying to be nice. And you're keeping the blonde tips becuuuuuuzzzz????

She recently had a baby? Okay. That explains the clothes as well. She was pretty casual. Not that she has to dress up for us, but seeing that it was our first meeting, I did expect her to look more...yes, I'm going to say it again...polished and professional. Maybe she can't fit into her pre-pregnancy clothes yet, but still...

So she's not the fashion maven I am...that's funny...no, really, it is...that doesn't mean she doesn't know her stuff. Talking to her, she did seem to know her stuff, so I ignored whatever red flags were wanting to pop up. I mentioned in an earlier post that we were thinking we should ask more than what she recommended. Turns out we're not alone. RD ran into our self-appointed "Block Captain" earlier this evening. Come to find out she is putting her house on the market May 1. Though her house is up on the "nice end of the street," it is basically the same house. When RD told her what we were planning on asking...I guess there's no harm in me sharing - $155,000...she about blew a gasket.

Let's see if I can make this long story short...

She's planning on asking $185,000(!!!!) for her house. The house up the street from her (also comparable to our's...aside from the better view) was listing for $163,000. They received FIVE offers the first day on the market, all over asking price. The highest bidder actually said they would go as high as $175,000 if they had to. WHOA! Now...the Block Captain (isn't that silly?) said she heard that the people nextdoor to us are planning on asking $149,900, so she asked RD if he would talk to them to talk them up in price. This is getting hairy. She also then urged him to up our price - a minimum of $165,000. Because of course, there's no way she's going to get that high a price for her's if we go as low as $155,000. Makes sense to me. Maybe we should reconsider.

Sooooo....yet ANOTHER long story short, we're meeting with a different, seemingly more experienced, realtor a week from Monday. Thanks to neighborhood gossip (only thing our Block Captain is good for...just HOW DOES she get her information?!), we might be able to make a more-informed decision. I'm really looking forward to hearing what this new realtor has to say.

As for home projects, RD finished rebuilding our deck today. The wood was rotting out and would in no way pass inspection. It looks WONDERFUL. I love having a handyman for a husband. He's the best!

Go Babies! Go Babies!

Exciting news on the homefront today...

SJ took his first couple steps lastnight! He has since forgotten how to do it, but it's progress, my friends, progress! He was so proud - giggling away, looking back and forth at RD and me, making sure we saw his accomplishment. I just sat there with my jaw hanging open - in shock - eyes welling up with tears. I'm a sap I tell ya.

I think I've mentioned before...our babies aren't wanting anything to do with sippy cups. They chew on the spout, but they just aren't getting that they have to tilt the cup up to get anything out of it. At the recommendation of some other triplet moms, I purchased some straw-sippies. They still just wanted to chew on the rubber straw...loving it; just not catching on. We got excited when they'd get a mouthful of milk - but I think it was by accident. We'll keep practicing...

AR is still going around saying Duuuude, well more like Duuuuuuu-wah. I think it bugs RD, but I think it's adorable. It has replaced DeeDee (daddy) lately, so I guess I can see why he's not loving it so much.

SA had been really good at pointing out our noses. It looks like he's now catching on that mommy and daddy are not the only ones that have these funny-looking things, so he's now pointing out everyone's nose - news anchors on TV, AR's and SJ's, and the animals on their flash cards. Friends or family will be playing with them and they'll jump and say, "Ahhh! He's trying to pick my nose. " No, he's just trying to show you that you have one. That's my boy!

So that's what's new with the kiddos. Keeping us smiling as always.

Everyday Rubbish

First I must say that I'm so glad the whole gas incident happened - BECAUSE, thanks to that craziness, I was prompted to call the gas company to come check things out. He checked out our oven, and lo and behold there was a problem that needed to be fixed. It seems our igniter has worn out - so when turned on, the igniter would fail to click(?) and then the gas would just run and run; hence, the fumes that turned my world white.

While he was here, he said he was going to check the rest of our lines, and it should only take a minute. I got wrapped up in Dr. Phil (Did you watch that today?!) and RD was working on the deck...an hour later I check to see how RD's doing and realize - the gas man's still there. We got so consumed in our own little worlds, we were totally oblivious to the man hammering away on pipes downstairs while we went about our business. How the babies managed to sleep through that racket is a miracle in itself! Turns out we had pipes leaking gas all over the place. That explains a lot! Duhr. He said it's not like our house would blow in the next few weeks, but it's something that would pose a problem if we didn't tend to it soon. Thank God for small miracles. I'M SERIOUS! Just think - that craving I had for cheese fries just might've saved our house (and US, considering we never go anywhere) from blowing to pieces. Who'da thunk?!

So that was this afternoon...

This morning, the realtor came over to asses our house. The price she recommended is little lower than what we were thinking. I had looked at some comparable houses in the area, but she pointed out one major fault. If you know me, or have read any of my older entries, you know the problem. Da-ta-da-da...our neighbors. We have quite the diverse street, us being on the low-end of the scale. At the top of the street are $500,000+ houses, mixed in with modest two-bedroom homes. Our house is quite a bit nicer than these smaller homes up yonder, but their modest houses look out to these large, beautiful, Colonial-style homes; whereas our view consists of a truck up on blocks, PLANTED artificial flowers, large blue tarps, a black Mitsubishi of some sort with red bumpers and white Japanese (?) decals on the windshield...and I could go on...and on.

I knew our neighbors would be a problem.

Me: I guess there's not much we can do about it, but I was wondering about...our neighbors.

Realtor: Yeeaaaa. That's money. They're going to cost you. Now if you were at the top of the street.

Me: *sigh* Yes, the top of the street. The coveted top of the street.

Realtor: Sounding a little too excited... Those houses up there?! My God! They're beautiful! Ohhhh, how I'd love to walk out my front door to see that everyday! Now THAT'S a view! It makes you feel... Starts shimmy-ing shoulders back and forth and purses her lips out and let's out a giggle.

Yea, lady. We get your point.

So we decided on a price and started figuring when would be best to go on the market. The builder says our house should be ready by late-June/early-July, but that's never a sure thing. Both the realtor and builder have encouraged us to prepare ourselves for a possible double-move. Hell, nobody wants to do that, but if it has to be done, it has to be done. I don't want our house to be on the market forever, so we'll do whatever we have to...to an extent.

As of now, we're aiming for April 15; end of April at the latest. That will give us more time to get things ready (finish projects, get inspections, etc.), and our annuals should be up by then, which will make the house look even better.

Now I've got a hankering for some chocolate, so off I go!

Wisteria Lane

As if having triplets doesn't bring me enough attention. No, not nearly enough. Doing my part to create drama in order to give the neighbors something to talk about, with a quick call to 911 I had three fire trucks, four police cars, and an ambulance parked outside my house within minutes.

What happened, you ask?

Well, you see I was hungry. Very hungry. Due to RD's very long work hours lately, our cupboards are pretty bare since it's been a good while since I've gone grocery shopping. We've been making those quick runs to get "just enough" to keep our children from withering away to nothing. It was 8 o'clock and I realized I hadn't yet eaten dinner. I can count on one hand the number of times I've "forgotten" to eat. Don't you hate those people that always "forget" to eat. I think skinny people just say that to make us not-so-skinny people feel like pigs. I looked in the freezer and found we had half-a-bag of french fries. mmmm...with some cheddar?! CHEESE FRIES! YUM! So I preheat the oven...I'm putting some dishes away....and, "what's that smell?" We usually get a little whiff of gas when we first turn the oven on, so I decide to ignore it. Then I get a little light-headed. hmmmm...time to worry? I turn to face the oven and what do I do? Take a BIG whiff. I don't know what I was thinking. I guess I was trying to reassure myself that I wasn't really smelling anything. As quickly as I took that whiff, the room started to go white. I started rushing around the room in circles. I truly think I was delirious. These thoughts of me passing out and not being able to get to my unconscious babies were whirling through my head. I guess I thought if I kept moving (in circles?) I would be alert enough not to pass out. I opened up the kitchen window, ran to the front of the house to open up the screen door (almost all our windows are painted shut, so these were my only options), then grabbed the cordless phone. I first paged RD. I don't know what I expected him to do. I guess I was hoping he'd give me some quick instructions, so I could avoid what was to follow. Because obviously, I don't handle these emergency situations very well. And here I thought I was one who worked great under pressure! Humph!

I didn't know who to call. The Fire Department? I was still feeling dizzy, and in fear of something happening to the babies - and me not being able to get to them - I called 911.

Dispatcher: 911. What's your emergency?

Me: Well...I...uh...I turned on the oven...and it smelled of gas really strong....and I got dizzy......uh...I've got three kids and I'm worried. Could you send someone from the Fire Department to check for gas?

Dispatcher: Did you turn it off?

Me: Yes. Yes, I did.

Dispatcher: Are the kids acting strange?

Me: No. Um, I don't think so. Their door's shut. I opened windows...they're sleeping and their room isn't near the kitchen...the windows are open...I think they're okay.

Dispatcher: Make sure all the windows are open. Get the kids and wait outside. I'm sending someone over.

Me: Um...there's three. I can't.... Just hurry up.

So here's my biggest fear. I have to get the kids (who are all sleeping so soundly) all out of the house, and I'm home alone. F. F. F. I'm a big weanie when it comes to cussing. Especially the "f" word. It was drilled into me as a child that ladies never curse. I guess it stuck with me. I called my mom who lives five minutes away.

I start pacing, wondering how I do this. I grabbed the van keys, the phone, and RAN to the neighbors to see if they could help me carry the kids, and we hang in their house until things were all clear. Before you think I'm a horrible mother for leaving them, even for a second, I had turned the gas off, opened (all available) windows, and it didn't smell bad anymore - but I did still want it checked out. And their door was closed...and yes, I feel guilty...and yes I need to work on my emergency drills!!!!! Ugh. No answer. I ran back to my house and already a police officer was walking up.

Me: First...First....can you...will you please help me carry my babies out to the van?

PO: Yes. Are you okay?

Me: Yes. I just want to get my babies out to the van.

PO: Sure. Do you need help carrying them?

Me: Yes! Yes. There's three of them. Triplets.

PO: Oh...okay.

So we go in and wake my three, beautiful sleeping babies. AR was PISSED. SA was scared. SJ...he could care less - I think he was excited at the chance to get up for awhile. We carry my shivering babies out to the van, and I cranked up the heat. As we were walking out to the van, I heard sirens, LOUD sirens, coming from every direction.

Me: BIG SIGH That's not all for me...is it?

PO: Yes, mam.

Damn. Damn. Damn. All I wanted was someone to come out to check - JUST IN CASE - and the city's throwing everything they've got at me. UGH.

So now there are bright lights all up and down our street. Firemen running in my house. My God...this is crazy. It was just a little leak. Is this necessary?

VERY long story short...there was a minor leak. We're not allowed to use our stove/oven until someone checks it out. Just great. It's not like we have anything to cook anyway. I was told the gas level was back down to zero, and we could go back in. My mom was here by this time, so she helped me carry the babes back to bed. Luckily, they were exhausted and went right back to sleep without a fuss.

RD came home shortly after the last truck left. He just smiled and shook his head.

Me: I just wanted to be sure.

RD: Smiling Uh-huh.

Me: What if I passed out? What if I passed out and couldn't get to the babies?

RD: Uh-huh.

Me: Would you have rather I waited to find out the hard way?

RD: Still smiling No. Now laughing.

Still hungry, I offered to run up to McDonald's to get us a late dinner. I brought him a chicken nuggets meal and me a Big Mac.

RD: What's that?

Me: A Big Mac?

RD: Damn! Awful late for that, isn't it?

Me: You know me. When I go out, I go ALL OUT.

RD: Ain't that the truth.

We both laughed.

My Interview!

I am lucky to have been chosen by Cori to be interviewed! If you haven't met Cori, head on over. She's is a wonderful, sweet woman and a witty writer!

1. If you could have the same bundles of joy, would you choose to have them as single births spread out over the next few years?

I've been asked that several times. It has crossed my mind - then I wonder what order they would come in and immediately decide it's a horrible idea. I know this sounds silly, because if it worked out that way I wouldn't know any different, but having all three now, I think of how much I'd miss the other two. Plus, it's so much fun watching them interact with each other. In some ways, I wonder if it's easier raising them at the same age all at once, as opposed to spreading them out.

2. Single best feature of your NEW HOUSE?

Space! We are now living in a very small, two bedroom, one bath house. It's so hard to pick just one feature. I guess what I'm most excited about is the Bonus Room, which will give the kids more room to play; second, is the big kitchen (I'll actually have counterspace); and third, an extra bathroom (RD and I will no longer have to fight over space to brush our teeth!).

3. What do you like best about blogging?

My mind is constantly going. I overanalyze EVERYTHING. Blogging works as a release for me. Instead of obsessing on something, I write about it here and it seems to take a bit of the weight off my shoulders. Well...let's face it, I'm still going to obsess, because that's what I do best, but it does lighten the load a bit. :)

4. If you weren't a SAHM, what would you choose to be?

I can't say for sure. Real estate has always interested me. That's something I've considered getting involved in once the kids are all in school. If I was to start all over, go back in time, I'd go to school to be a teacher. I would want to teach at the Middle School or High School level. What subject? Ahhh...tough one. There are several that interest me, so I guess I should be glad I'm not in a position to pick just one.

5. What is your favorite movie?

Cousins with Ted Danson and Isabella Rossellini. It is a wonderful love story. There are very few movies that I can sit through over and over again, and this is definitely one of them.

Thanks for the interview, Cori! Now I will interview the first five to comment on this entry! :D

My Gettin'-Ready-To-Sell To-Do List

1. Clean out my closet and drawers. Bag up clothes for charity.
2. Kindly remind RD 5-10 times to start going through his closet.
3. Windex all the windows. Have RD do the outside.
4. Wash the dining room curtains and hang them back up. Then remember to pull the highchairs away from the window so the kids will stop grabbing the curtains with their messy hands during mealtime.
5. Wipe down the outside of all the kitchen cabinets, the refrigerator, the stove/oven.
6. Clean the blades of all the ceiling fans.
7. Shampoo the carpets in the bedrooms.
8. Pack/Give/Throw away any knick knacks around the house so it looks less cluttered.
9. Basement. The basement. Ugh...the basement. A dumpster is being delivered next Tuesday so we can clean out the basement. It is a disaster. I started in the basement today. I can not believe the crap I have been holding on to for YEARS. Why? Just because that ten-year old sweater says Polo on it, doesn't mean it's a keeper! I have a box of about 200 cocktail napkins from our wedding. For some reason I thought I better hang on to them - sentimental reasons I guess. They're all yellow and gross. Time for them to hit the trash!
10. Buy some big Rubbermaid tubs to store stuff I want to take with us. I can't stand storing stuff in cardboard boxes. Spiders! Spiders! Spiders!
11. Label the tubs so I actually know what's in them (e.g., Halloween, Easter, Christmas, books, bags, etc.).
12. Dust the hanging pots and pans rack above the stove. I don't think I've done that since RD hung the damn thing. I should probably wear a mask!
13. Clean out the kitchen pantry.
14. Clean out the bathroom closets.
15. Buy new (updated) fixture for foyer and above kitchen sink.
16. Touch-up paint where needed.
17. Figure out what in the hee-haw hell I'm going to do with three kids and two cats when someone wants to look at the house.

I'm sure there's more, but my head's about to burst, so I'll stop here.

House For Sale

My postings in the next few weeks will probably be a bit sporadic. BOY, do we have our work cut out for us! The builder says our house should be ready mid- to late-June. I'm thinking that probably means July. So in talking to a few people, if we want to close on our house in June, we want our current house sold by May. The agent I spoke to said an "easy" closing will take about a month (allowing time for inspections, etc.) and a "difficult" closing will take at least a month and a half. Add that all up...we need to get our house ready for the market - FAST! We're aiming for April 1.

What we're struggling with is - do we use an agent or go 'For Sale By Owner'? If we didn't have three kiddos to deal with, I'd definitely do FSBO. But that requires a lot of work...there's advertising, finding a lawyer, hosting open houses on our own...just more than I really want to deal with right now. BUT, that's a big price to pay. 6%!!!! Ugh. I just don't know what to do.

As I've mentioned before, "I don't know" is RD's favorite answer for everything, so he says it's up to me.

I would really like to just hand everything over to this agent (whom I really like BTW), but is it worth the money? My sanity says, "hell yes," while my pocket book says, "are you kidding, me?"

So again I am looking to you, my dear friends, for advice. What have been your experiences? And as much as I'm hoping you'll say, "GO FOR THE AGENT," I really would like your honest opinion. Keep in mind we have three one-year olds and are building a house at the same time - no pressure - I'm not trying to sway you! heehee!

Cantcha throw the girl a bone?

We were going to meet the builder lastnight to go over our options (yes, we are officially building a house! WOO HOO!). I've been chained to the house a bit with the kids, so I haven't been out much. Most any occasion now calls for some gussying up. I had my little bag filled with new make-up from Lancome, so I thought I'd have fun experimenting.

I was feeling pretty. No. I was feeling DAMN PRETTY. I'm sure you ladies have been there. I walk out of the bedroom donning my new face - waiting for his reaction. Nothing.

That's okay. I didn't do anything drastic. It was very subtle really. But to me it was obvious that I was looking much prettier than I would on your average day.

Several hours later, I go up to RD and say, "Do I look different?"

He immediately got that panicked look men get when they realize they missed something they were supposed to notice.

RD: What did you do? Um...help me out.

Me: Nothing big. I just...my make-up's different.

RD: Leans in studying my face.

Me: Can't you tell?

RD: Looks the same. It doesn't look any different.

Me: Yes it does! It's better. The application is pretty much the same, but it's different colors, better make-up.... It's smoother.

RD: Scrunches up face as if to say he's sorry. Can't tell. Looks the same.

Me: *Long sigh* Oh well.

At least I feel pretty. All that work and...

RD: You always look pretty.

Me: Heart melting. Aw...you're so sweet. Thank you.

Great recovery!

All That Jazz

Our babies are now one-year old toddlers!

The party was a lot of fun - a lot of work - but fun. What it did show me, or remind me of rather, was how wonderful many of our friends are. I don't know how we could've done it without their help. They were absolutely WONDERFUL.

What added to the chaos was that we didn't have the party at our house, but at our friend's condo clubhouse. It worked out nice because there's no way we could've fit everyone in our house, but it made clean-up a bit of a hassle. Even though we requested 'no gifts,' I think every single person brought one (and most brought THREE), so there were many gifts to lug home; there was bits of cake, chips, and sandwich meat EVERYWHERE; many sodas got spilled; and then there was the whole production of packing up the babies and all their schtuff and getting them home.

My friend, C, went with me to Sam's earlier in the day to get all the food, cake, and drinks. We then unloaded everything at the clubhouse and did a bit of decorating. We went to TGI Friday's for lunch, then stopped at Famous to pick up some make-up (it's Lancome Bonus Time!). I rushed home for a quick shower, then we got the babies dressed, packed up the van, and headed over for the party.

Most everyone came. There were a few no-shows, but they were expected (isn't it always the same people that never show?). There were clusters all around the room of different friends (my side/his side), our families (again, my side/his side) - and every now and then the sides would mingle, exchange some polite conversation, then move back to their side of the room.

The kids were pretty good. SA and SJ got a bit fussy, but their nap got cut short, and with all the excitement around them, I think it got to be too much after awhile. The whole cake-eating experience wasn't as messy as I thought it would be. I had planned on giving them these big, whomping pieces to dive into, but RD gave each of them very small slivers (from the white side of the cake, instead of the chocolate), so the clean-up was minimal. They were having a good time and I got some good pictures, so I didn't complain. :)

Silly me - I had thought C and I could pack everything up and get the kids home on our own while the boys stayed back to clean. That all got shot to hell, but it worked out great. Whatever made me think she and I could lug all that back to the house on our own is beyond me! So I ran around cleaning up (with a lot of help from C!), while the guys loaded up our van, as well as their two cars with the presents, leftover food, and beer and soda. During this time there were still some extra hands around to keep the babies occupied.

Once we got home, got the kids to bed, and unpacked all the cars, RD and the guys went out for some drinks and I unwrapped all the gifts. I had been looking forward to it (I love presents!), but by the time I had cleaned up our kitchen and straightened things up somewhat, I was so tired it seemed more exhausting than anything. They got so many great toys and really neat clothes. I think I'm just going to pack away a lot of the toys until we move. There's just no where to put everything, and with us putting our house on the market next month (more about that later), I don't need to add to the clutter.

So all in all the party was a success. There were so many people hacking and sneezing...congested and watery-eyed, but of course they all had excuses (e.g., I'm not contagious...I was sick last week, this is just a cough...I don't have a fever, etc.). I won't get into my rant right now on how ridiculous I think it is for someone to go to a CHILDREN'S BIRTHDAY PARTY when they're sick!! ugh! It's not just my kids I worry about, but my friend, D, was there with her 5-week old daughter - the poor thing hung out in the corner the whole time (and left early) because of all the coughing going on. So I wouldn't be at all surprised if one or all of us gets sick within the next couple of days - actually, I expect it.

Now I'm trying to get the kids back on schedule. Funny how that works - after a big day, the next day is always hell. Naps are messed up, feedings...they're all wound up and crabby. It seems to take a few days to reprogram from all the stimulation I guess.

I'm going to try and put a dent in some cleaning. I might be back tonight to recap on all the house stuff (betcha can't wait! ha!).

Until next time...

Mommy needs...

...her husband to cut back on the "I don't know's" because they drive her crazy.
Me: Should I get beer for the (birthday) party?
RD: Do you think we should?
Me: I asked you. Do you think we should have beer?
RD: I don't know.
Me: Deep breath... I really need a better answer than "I don't know"?

...her husband to not leave his shoes in the foyer anymore, because the babies really like to chew on them (nice germ-infested shoes, fresh from the ER).

...to remember that she at one time was that childless friend that "didn't get" how crazy life is as a parent, when she gets angered by all the ignorant, unknowing, how-can-you-be-so-busy-when-you're-home-all-day comments from her childless friends.

...to realize that those little comments she says in anger when her children frustrate her, aren't going to be meaningless babble to her children much longer. Though they can't speak, they're understanding more and more, so mommy must choose her words carefully, because words can hurt so much.

...to actually look at her to-do list. Mommy keeps forgetting how forgetful she is.

...to get back on the weight-loss wagon - because it's hard to feel sorry for someone who isn't even trying.

...to take more pictures of her children and write more often in their journals - because they grow so fast, and she won't remember as much as she thinks she will.

It started with a little Men at Work

I've been trying to limit the tv-watching during the day. The only show I like to watch is The Today Show*; other than that, I just like it on as background noise. The kids really don't seem to notice the tv at all. Every now and then a jingle will catch their attention, but as soon as the jingle's over, so is their interest. Even still, I thought it wouldn't hurt to tune it out.

So now our new thing is to play the radio. The kids seem to love the music, and I do, too. It's funny what songs will get them bopping in place. Most recently "Summer of 69" by Brian Adams and "What Have You Done for Me Lately" by Janet Jackson has got their groove a-movin'. SA and AR bounce up and down, while SJ's dance moves are to sway from side to side.

The station I usually listen to plays all 80's and early-90's music from 12:00 to 1:00 p.m. - they call this their Retro-Music Hour. As a child of the 80's, I'm in heaven. Yesterday, they had it going on. I was feeding the kids lunch, dancing from highchair to highchair. AR would clap as she watched me dance, SJ would smile sheepishly at how silly mommy was being, and SA kept giving me this look that said, "I'm still getting more Dino Nuggets...right?"

Their highchairs are lined up against the dining room window. So I was a dancing fool for all the neighbors to see - but I didn't care. They played "Who Can it Be Now?" by Men at Work, "Puttin' on the Ritz" by Taco, "Dancing Queen" by ABBA, "Lost in Emotion" by Lisa Lisa, "Rio" by Duran Duran, and more. By the time they got to "Stand Back" by Stevie Nicks, I couldn't take it anymore. I was having so much fun, I had to be the dork that I am and call the radio station.

To my surprise, I got through right away.

(Girl) DJ: Y98 FM

Me: Hi. I just had to tell you - you are playing the best music. I am having the greatest time dancing around!

DJ: Wonderful! What's your name?!

Me: uh-oh...wait a minute. Her sing-song voice is telling me that I'm going to be on the radio. heehee! Mel___ _____.

DJ: Where are you calling me from today?

Me: Home...I'm a stay-at-home mom.

DJ: Great! How many kids do you have? I can hear them in the background.

Me: Three.

DJ: How old are they?

Me: They'll be one this Saturday. They're triplets. Thinking, "Please, Miss DJ. Please don't say something stupid now."

DJ: Oh! God bless you.

Me: Sigh of relief. Thank you!

We then hung up and I rushed to turn the radio up. Two songs later, right after "Footloose" by Kenny Loggins was our call. I was so excited! I felt like a giddy school girl, and immediately called my friend, D. I gushed to her how I was on the radio. She went on about how cool that was, then we moved on to more grown up topics.

Such a silly little thing, but it made my day.

Later when RD got home, I told him of my 15 seconds of glory. I then told him how funny my voice sounded on the radio. He said, "I love your voice. You sound like a little girl, but you have a really nice voice." Awww, thanks honey. :)

*When I went to NBC's website to get the Today Show link, there was a pop-up of Matt LeBlanc right over the search box. I can't believe that show is still on. I started yelling at the computer screen, "Get out of the way, Joey!!" I think I need to cut back on the caffeine. ha!

Can I get a hoooo-yaaaaa

We've been approved! Yeaahhh!! Next step is we're meeting with the builder Monday night to go over what options we would like, and we're going to try to get a better idea of what cost we're looking at here. Let's just say - RD is a nervous wreck. The guy hates to spend money on anything, especially anything big. He's stressing quite a bit. No matter how much money he makes, he will always talk like he hasn't got a pot to piss in. He prefers to call himself frugal, I would use another word (LOL), but you gotta love 'em!

I called to order the kids' cake for their party. I don't know what I have against Winnie the Pooh - I think just because he's overdone, but I just don't like Pooh. BUT that's the only style in which I could find the plates, the hats, the cups...the whole shabang, so Pooh it is. I asked Sam's Club Bakery if they have any Winnie the Pooh designs they could put on the cake. She yelled back to ask their designer, then came back on the line and said, "Yea, we have Pooh here." heeheeheehee! It took everything in me to hold back the laughter. I thought about making a crack back at her about their POO, but she didn't seem like one to get my kind of humor, so I let it slide.

I've got a super long entry that's been sitting as a draft for a long time. I'm hoping to get it done someone in the next couple of days. Those are always the fun ones. Almost like little therapy sessions. RD doesn't get the whole blog-thing, and teases me about it often. He doesn't understand he should be thanking me, because thanks to Blog Land, I get all my frustrations out through the Internet instead of him.

Yet even more randoms

I've got tunnel vision happening right now with this house deal. Why did we have to try for loan approval the Friday before President's Day weekend? It's making for a long weekend. So you'll have to bare with me, as some random thoughts are all I can muster right now.

I think AR is going to take her first steps any day now. Each day she is standing unassisted longer and longer. She even will do her little bounce/jump jig and clap her hands while standing, she just hasn't made that step forward yet. It's such a conflict of emotions for me. I'm excited, yet sad at the same time. Yes, again...THEY'RE GROWING UP TOO FAST!!

They are doing great with table foods. Once they started, we didn't look back. They're eating chicken nuggets, grilled cheese sandwiches, pancakes, waffles, french toast sticks, green beans, fish sticks, mac & cheese - you name it. This might sound strange, but I love the sound of them eating. I'll turn the stereo or tv down and just listen to them chewing, swallowing, and humming their little mmm-mmm-mmm-this-tastes-good tune.

The visiting nurse weighed them the other day. AR was 19 lb. 6 oz., SJ was 20 lb. 7 oz., and SA was 22 lb. 5 oz. SA's so big, but so solid!

I watched What Not to Wear yesterday on TLC. They made over a woman who I guess riverdanced (The website said it was Irish step dancing, but by the looks of it, it's the same thing?). She kept doing her little riverdance throughout the whole show - down the sidewalk, in the fitting rooms, in the middle of the stores. It was very annoying. RD said, "I'm sure they made her do that." No one would make anyone look that ridiculous. It almost made me turn the channel. Awful. Nothing against riverdancing. Hey, if that's your thing, that's great. Just don't do it down the aisles of DSW. Ugh.

The kids birthday party is this Saturday. I am not at all prepared. I need to order the cake and figure out what kind of appetizers I'm going to get. I guess I should pick up some decorations as well. See how bad I get? I've gotten so wrapped up in this house, the kids' birthday party has taken the back burner. I'm so awful. If they were of an age that they would know any different, I would be more obsessive about the party than anything, but I figure it's more for us than them. They won't even know any different. I know - I sound awful. It'll all come together in the end. Sometimes I think I do better last minute anyway.

Well, my bladder is about to burst, so I guess I'll wrap this up. Have a wonderful weekend, everybody!

Until next time...

Poo Talk

Remember the game, "What's grosser than gross?"

I've got one for ya.

Mandarin Oranges

"What's so gross about Mandarin Oranges?"

Glad you asked!

Poop. Feed your kids some Mandarin Oranges and they're going to have some wicked awful poop. AWFUL. Little roly-poly orange balls that the wipe just doesn't want to wipe up.

It's some serious nasty stuff.

'til Tuesday

Have I mentioned I'm impatient? Surely I've mentioned it. Not just a little impatient - out-of-control impatient in the most irritating way possible. I hate waiting for anything.

When I talked to our banker this morning, she said we should know within a few hours whether or not we've been approved for the loan. She then called back about an hour later to ask me a few more questions, then went on to say that it will take a couple days to get the prequalification letter, then she will courier it to our home. We went over some other basic information - what account we want the $50 prequalification charge taken from, whether we want the 5/1 ARM or the 7/1 ARM (only options for Physician-Loan), etc. About 30 minutes after we got off the phone I started going over our conversation again in my head. Now - she said the letter would be ready in a couple days - does that mean we're approved? She didn't say, "You're approved," but she did say the letter will be sent out soon.

First I had myself convinced that this call meant we were approved, then I decided I was jumping to conclusions because she never said those magic words, "You're approved." I thought then that I could just wait a few more hours, then if she didn't call, I would then call to clarify. A few hours? That's just too long to wait. So I called. I told her I was sorry to bother her...blahblahblah...but was I to take that call as an acceptance? Were we approved or was that an if-you-are-approved-this-is-what-comes-next call? Unfortunately, it was the latter.

As it turns out, the Physician-Loan isn't an automatic process; it has to go through an Underwriter, which takes longer. She said looking at our credit report she has no reason to be anything but optimistic, but I'm still a nervous wreck. We've gone through this loan before, and we were TWO POINTS off. Two lousy points kept us from refinancing a few years ago. To qualify for this loan, we not only have to have excellent credit, but EXCELLENT credit. What knocked us out of EXCELLENT last time was the car we had just bought. It wasn't the added debt of the new car that hurt us, but the running of our credit report that had knocked some points off our rating. It's so crazy how credit rating works.

Tuesday. Now she says we won't know until Tuesday. That's what? Four days away? I don't even know what day it is. So I'll let you know right now - I'm going to be a basket case until Tuesday.

Have I mentioned I'm impatient?

I Think I Can

I'm just sick. Sick to my stomach.

It's looking like the house is going to be a done deal soon. We haven't gotten official loan approval yet, but our banker (I know she has an official title, but right now I can't remember what it is) says she's positive everything will be fine.

Why am I sick? I'm very happy about the house. I love it and think it is a perfect fit for us. I'm sick because it's such a major decision. I'm not worried about the financial aspects - that's too easy, I'm being flooded with more irrational fears more than anything. You know...those "mother fears."

It all started when watching Montell this morning. It was about true crimes and evil living in your neighborhood. I only caught part of it, but the segment I watched was about a woman who was kidnapped and raped by her nextdoor neighbor when she was ten years old.

Me: My God! You know what...I better check the sex offender registry. I don't know anything about that neighborhood. This is a good area. There's no reason why I should be concerned, but as a mother, well...you know - the mind can take you to some crazy, crazy places.

RD: I can hear in his voice the pleasure in "getting me going" about something. It's a new neighborhood. The sex offenders probably haven't even registered yet. We won't know until it's too late. He then let out an exaggerated sigh. I swear he loves to see me squirm.

So now all day I've been going through the what-if's.

What if...

Our kids are hit by a car while they're outside playing.
They're kidnapped.
They get seriously hurt by a bully at school.
We're in a car accident on our way home.
One or all of them are harmed (I can't even say the word) by a neighbor.

I keep thinking of all these what-if's and how they could be avoided if we didn't move to this house. I keep wondering if there'll ever be a "someday" when I wished we hadn't made this decision.

Again, there is no basis for this. I've done this before. It's just the fear of making a big step and wondering if there's something waiting for us in the future, something that we're making happen by making this big decision.

I'm sure (I should probably say, "I know...") I would be doing this no matter where we were going, or whether it was tomorrow or four months from now - but then there's this other voice in my head saying, "Is this feeling a sign you shouldn't do this?" Logically, rationally, I know that if I followed that voice every time I heard it (and no, I don't have voices in my head, work with me here! ha!), I would never be making any changes or big steps - EVER.

So I'll just hope this feeling passes. Soon. Why I have to always do this...ugh. I get so excited over things, then I second guess myself. It's such an ugly, exhausting cycle.

Excuse me while I bore you with some randoms

The house hunt - where do I start? Okay, I'll try to make this short. I think last I left off, RD was on his way out to look at the house I had looked at and liked (a lot!). The base price was great, but once we figured all the options we'd like, it put the house way out of our price range. We wanted to look at the next model down, but they didn't have one for us to look at. Figures the only display home they have available is the biggest and most expensive! This builder has many communities (subdivisions...whatever!), so I drove out (way out - about a 45-minute drive) to look at the model we were now considering. I loved it. RD still needs to look at it. The visiting nurse is coming tomorrow to give the kids their last round of Synagis, then he works in the afternoon, so I'm not sure if he'll be able to look at it until Friday. I think he'll like it. It's pretty much the same house as this last one, but smaller. Next step...loan approval. This is where it gets tricky. He doesn't start his job until July - he'll be getting a substantial bump in salary at that time - yet we're still waiting on the official contract, which we'd need for loan approval. The job is his, it's just that the paperwork takes a long time - why is beyond me.

Valentine's dinner was wonderful. The whole house stuff dominated most of the conversation - but that was a welcome change to all the baby talk. I love my kids, but it's nice to talk about something other than the kids once in awhile!

It's amazing how the weather can affect one's mood. We had a couple of days of gorgeous weather - mid-70's, sunny, clear sky. I opened up our one working window - the babies all stood up at the window and took in the fresh air. They reminded me of our cats - the way they held their noses up in the air, eyes squinted, breathing it all in. We were hoping to get the kids out for a walk, but with the going back and forth to the house(s), time slipped away.

I wish I had more to say, but I don't. I know my posts have been lacking any sort of entertainment value, but...again, I don't have much to say. This house stuff is sucking up every bit of energy and every thought in my head. If you're sticking with me through these boring entries - God love ya! ;)

Until next time...

Shake, Rattle, and Roll

No exciting news to report. We went to look at the displays and check out the homesites. The house - there's only one word to describe it - AMAZING. The whole ride out there RD had this gruff look on his face, knowing in my head I was already moving us in.

When we pulled up he looked over to "the one" and said, "Is that it?" He said it very casually, but I could tell he was impressed. We weren't even five feet in the place and I could tell he was sold. He was studying every detail. He went from room to room saying, "We should do this...I want that...isn't this great...we'd need this..."

Now on to the lots. There were only a few left, only one private. It was on the small side, but we loved the house so much we were quickly coming up with all the reasons why "the big yard" could wait.

Then we saw it. How we missed it is beyond me. I think we were so drunk over this house we were oblivious to any imperfections that might be lurking.

A huuuuge rock quarry. A fully-active, rock quarry. Right next to the community. RD hates it when I use the word community. "Will you just say subdivision, because that's what they are." "Yes, but they call them communities." You know, those "they" people that know everything.

We went back and forth on how much this mattered to us. You couldn't actually see the quarry from this particular lot, but we'd have to hear it, right? How could we not? We debated back and forth for the rest of the day on whether or not this was a deal-breaker. We both knew it was, but I was having a hard time letting go of this "perfect house." I sat down on the couch late lastnight to go through the big folder they gave us with all the literature on the builder, the area, etc. In the very back, hidden behind all the brochures going on about how great this place is was a letter from the City Examiner - about the rock quarry. It went into great detail about how home owners may be startled by the noise, some home damage is to be expected (which they then downplayed because all homes suffer some wear and tear...yaddayadda...), and more red flags that screamed that this place wasn't so perfect after all.

I shouldn't be surprised. The price they were asking for this house seemed too good to be true - now we know why.

The problem with getting so worked up and excited about something is the low you get when things don't go your way. We watched The Terminal lastnight. RD loved it, but I couldn't stop thinking about the house. The house itself was so perfect, why oh why did it have to be next to a rock quarry. It kind of reminded me of an old Seinfeld episode. Remember the one where George was dating this woman who would be beautiful if it wasn't for her HUGE nose. He hated her nose, but knew if it weren't for her nose, she would be too beautiful for him - out of his league. Silly analogy maybe, but I guess that's how I looked at the house. The only reason we could afford this awesome house is because they thought that the constant booms and vibrations warranted a discount of sorts. So we move on.

So tomorrow I am going to check out two more communities. The one has larger houses on small lots and the other has what I would call average-size houses on larger lots. I'm going to check out both. I'm kind of wishing now that we hadn't seen the first. That first house we looked at was so grand - I'm afraid all others will pale in comparison.

We shall see.

In the meantime, have a wonderful V-Day! RD and I are going out to dinner while his mom watches the kids. Let's hope we have lots to celebrate! ;)

One Flew Over the New Home Community

I don't know why I'm even writing. I can't concentrate on anything and don't have anything interesting to say.

You see...I have this problem. I have a bit of a...obsessive-compulsive personality. I don't mind really. I take great pleasure in getting so wrapped up in a project, I can't even see straight. RD teases me that I'm not happy unless I'm obsessing about something. He's so right. Planning our wedding? I couldn't have been happier. Think about it! I had a year and half to become a crazed maniac over this one event. People teased me saying, "What ever are you going to do with yourself once the wedding is over?" No worries - two weeks after our wedding, I started my hunt for a house. Then I obsessed on getting every room decorated just perfect. You can always tell when I don't have anything to obsess over, because our house is sparkling. If I'm not obsessing over an upcoming event or task, I'm cleaning. I then become obsessed in making every detail of our house perfect. If I've got a project going on - forget it.

So you're probably thinking, "Get to the point! What are you obsessing about now?!"

As I've mentioned in previous posts, we are planning on moving this summer. I've been looking at houses on-line for the past month or so. Okay...I never stopped looking since the first time we moved - but I've been seriously looking for the past month or two.

RD's prerequisites for a house, and mine, are quite different. One big difference we had was WHERE; well, recently he added an area that he had previously gave a big "no way" to, so my mind went racing with all the possibilities. After doing some research, I found a new home community with some beautiful homes. Wouldn't you know it takes 5-6 months to build. PERFECT!

When approaching RD with my new plan, I knew I had to keep my cool. As soon as he sees I'm excited (and let's face it - CRAZY) about something, his red flag goes up. Yes, I've been known to get a little ahead of myself at times...I've been a bit...impulsive, so I knew what to do - I played it cool. Once he got home lastnight I waited about 45 minutes before I casually brought it up. I showed him the floorplans, the price sheet, etc. I tried to act as nonchalant as possible about it...and I think it might've worked. heehee! The lots are a lot smaller than what we were wanting, but these houses are...YOWZA! The house we'll be getting now isn't going to be the house we plan to retire in. RD wants to live in this next one for five years or so, then move into our "final" home. That way he can pay off some of his student loans, get a nest egg started, etc. My argument was that we can get a big house on a small lot now...then five years down the road get a big house on the big lot. Made sense to me.

SO...we're going to go look at the lots on Saturday. Wish me luck! Just think of all the fun I'll have obsessing over the details for the next six months! WOO HOO!

Wipe away the cobwebs and the sorrow

As my babies' first birthday approaches, I'm finding it hard to get very excited. Don't get me wrong, they are so much fun right now. Each month that passes I say, "This is my favorite age!!"

People always say, "They grow so fast!" The truth in those words is almost painful at times. I went over to visit my friend, D, and her new baby - just a few weeks old. Holding her, I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that there was a time AR, SJ, and SA were that tiny. Even smaller! Wow. My babies...they don't even seem like babies anymore. With the excitement of each milestone, I find myself mourning those that have passed.

That's why I want to thank Suzanne over at Dot Moms for writing this. Reading her story, it gave me the kick in the butt I needed. It reminded me that each day is a milestone and every tomorrow is a blessing - not something to fear, but something to embrace.

Thank you.

It's all about time

Did you know that if you forget about that pile of cat puke you passed this morning - you know, the one you were going to clean up right after you changed the diaper pail - clean up is pretty easy. If you let it sit long enough, you can actually peel it off the carpet in one piece. Just like that.

I bet the Fly Lady won't teach you that!

Can you hear me now?

After four years of marriage (as of next month!) and over six years together, it still never ceases to amaze me how I can be talking to RD for several minutes without him having the slightest clue that I am talking to him. I can be sitting right next to him, turned to face him, talking TO him, and at the end of whatever it was I was saying he looks at me and says, "Huh? Did you say something?" Then he swears up and down that he wasn't ignoring me, but that he really didn't hear me. WHEN I'M RIGHT NEXT TO HIM?! Even if I'm really into something I'm watching on tv, I can still hear everything going on around me. If we're watching something funny, he'll turn to look at me at funny parts (which I think is sweet) - I won't always turn to him, but I can see out of the corner of my eye that he does it - I notice. Geesh.

Sometimes he doesn't even hear the conversation he's in. This just happened a few days ago:

RD: They're done with that exercauser. We need to get something else to put their toys in.

They lost interest in the exercauser a couple months ago; right now it is acting as storage for all the toys in the living room.

Me: I'm going out next week. I'll pick something up.

RD: We don't need something that looks like a toy chest - maybe something that goes with....

Me: ...the decor?

RD: Yea.

Me: Yea, at Christmas I saw M and L had these cool baskets from World Market - I think they were $60. They were really big. They'd look nice.

RD: mumbles something then shrugs

A few minutes pass...

RD: What about that World Market place? They'd probably have something good.

Me: Yea. Good idea. Big sigh

Super Randoms

RD's working tonight and I'm not into football...at all...so I think I might watch a movie tonight. I've had 13 Going on 30 sitting on top of our entertainment center for about a week now, so I should probably take advantage of RD being gone and watch my chick-flick. In the past I've watched just for the commercials, but they usually run all the good ones in the days to follow anyway, so why force myself to sit through the game?! ;)

AR has made a complete transformation in the past week. She's like a new baby. Her babbling seems to have purpose now. She'll babble on and look at us like we're supposed to know what it is she's saying, and she'll be going on and on to her brothers like she's bossing them around. She'll also raise her tone at the end as if she's asking a question. It's precious! She's been consistently ahead of the boys, hopefully they'll be starting soon.

I've been a big chicken as far as food goes with the kids. The doctor gave us the okay to start giving them table food at their 9 mo. check-up (they're 11 1/2 mo. now), but we were still pureeing everything. We would give them Cheerios and bits of cheese, but hadn't been brave to try anything else. They've recently started to seem bored with the purees, so I decided to start experimenting with more foods. For lunch this morning they had pancakes (along w/their usual oatmeal, but I added yogurt today), for lunch they had grilled cheese sandwiches (cut up of course) and their usual green beans. They're doing quite well! The only problem is that they don't pace themselves. They're fine with cheese and green beans, but when I introduced pancakes and grilled cheese sandwiches to them today, they went wild and started cramming it all in their mouths at once. I guess they liked the new menu!

John's been working a lot of evenings lately. Mardi Gras is huge here and he works at one of the city hospitals, so he said he's been slammed with drunks. He said it wouldn't be so bad if it was the silly, goofy college crowd, but he said it's been all these older, angry drunks. When we first started dating (and drinking was one of our more common activities), Mardi Gras was something we always looked forward to - we knew we had a lot of partying ahead of us. Now I wouldn't even know it was that time of year if it weren't for the stories on the local news that run after the party, and now it's a time of year RD dreads because he has to deal with the idiots that just can't handle the fun.

I know I've said this before, but I really need to do something with my hair. Something drastic. Problem is, RD loves long hair. I know I should wear my hair how I like it, but I do like to look good for him...and if he likes it long...ugh...I just don't know.

I bought RD a monogrammed-locket key chain from Red Envelope (I love this store!) for Valentine's Day. I'm going to print off a tiny picture of the kiddos to put in it...now how I'm going to fit three little heads in that tiny locket...hmmmmmm. His mom is going to watch the kids so we can go out to dinner - alone. Yeaahhh! I'm so excited. It's been so long since we've been out alone. That reminds me - I need to hurry up and make reservations somewhere or our romantic evening is going to be spent at Mickey D's!

Enjoy the Superbowl, everyone!

To Have or Have Not

More children that is.

Can I tell you how sick I am of this question? I have absolutely NO RIGHT, considering I am constantly asking my friends and family with small children this question. Have you noticed that as soon as someone has a baby, they immediately want to go out and recruit?

As soon as RD and I were married, the interrogations came flying from every direction, "When are you having kids?...How many kids do you want?...When do you think you'll start trying?...Water, huh? Are you pregnant?...Anything you want to tell us?" We quickly put a stop to the questions when we insisted to everyone that we would not even think about having kids until RD was done with his residency. We believed this to be the complete truth at the time. We were not anticipating me being (unofficially...long story) diagnosed with endometriosis, and being told that my fertile years were numbered. So, with that information in mind, I started taking prenatal vitamins, and three months later we started trying. First try - success - or so we thought.

We wanted to keep my pregnancy a secret; at least until the second trimester. Everyone was clueless, which was wonderful. No one suspected a thing when I wasn't drinking alcohol or doing my best to hide my nausea, because we had convinced everyone that kids were way off in our future. By my 8th week, the nausea was really getting to me, and I had an ultrasound and got to see and hear her (we would later find out it was a girl) heart beat. And you know what they say, once you hear the heartbeat, the chances of a miscarriage go way down...blahblahblah. So we let the cat out of the bag.

Fastforward to Week 11 - my OB wanted to do another ultrasound because they couldn't find her heartbeat using the doppler. "This is totally normal," she said, "Don't worry. It's often hard to find. The ultrasound is just to put your mind at ease. Really, don't worry." Well - there was reason to worry. There was no heartbeat. The ultrasound showed that she had stopped growing probably sometime in her 9th week. One benefit of your husband being a physician is you're treated with extra care - a professional courtesy. Being my first pregnancy and miscarriage, it's not the norm to do genetic testing; something they usually do after loss #3. Lucky me, I got the white glove treatment. I'm sarcastic only because it's a tough subject for me. I am very grateful that they did the testing, as I know the "what if's" would've driven me insane - AND I would've assumed the first miscarriage to be the same result of what I would be tested for in later miscarriages. The next morning I underwent a D&C. The testing would show that I lost the baby due to Triploidy - a chromosomal abnormality. The ultrasound tech told me, "You should be happy the baby did not survive. She would have had many problems." Oh, yeah. Thank you. I feel much better now.

I really didn't want to go into my whole reproductive history, but I felt it was relevant to "having more." Anyway...

I was told we could not try again for at least two full cycles. This just killed me. RD was hurting as well and he wanted to wait even longer. Maybe he was scared of it happening again or maybe he felt he needed more time to heal, but I could not wait. I was obsessed. How strange to go from being scared to death of becoming pregnant to having every thought revolving around having a child.

So what happened next? I got pregnant - again and again and again. Five more times that I know for sure. After loss #6, I stopped testing. These next pregnancies were lost very early. Yes, I was sad, but I still yearned for the first. Those last five - I didn't get to see the little sac, the little head, her heartbeat. It was different.

I began to feel like a joke; almost embarrassed when calling to make an appointment with my OB, "Yes, this is Mel _____. I'm pregnant. Again." I could just picture the receptionist rolling her eyes. I'm sure she wasn't, but the depression I was in...I can't even explain. Every visit, I was directed to the Nurse Practitioner (standard for your first prenatal visit). I finally insisted on seeing my OB. With the pattern of the last miscarriages, she guessed immediately that it was an immunological problem and referred me to the Sher Institute. I'm not going to get into the nitty gritty details of my testing here (if you are going through something similar and would like me to share my story, I would be happy to e-mail you privately), but I consider my visit to Sher a blessing.

Skipping the testing and consultations, let's get to the good part - we decided IVF was our best option. You're probably asking yourself, "Why did they need to do IVF? GETTING pregnant obviously wasn't a problem." You're right, but the treatments that were necessary to prevent a miscarriage needed to be administered very early - before pregnancy testing was possible - meaning we would have to spend thousands of dollars on these treatments under the assumption that I was pregnant. Again, I can discuss details with you privately. That was too high a gamble for us, so that's where IVF came in.

Due to my young age (29) and good health, my doctor explained that they would only transfer two embryos, since the chances of implantation were high (normally they would transfer a higher number). After a very long month of twice-daily injections, our big day had arrived. It was the "transfer day" and we were waiting in the exam room. My doctor walked in with a long face, looked at each of us and said, "I'm not happy with the quality of these embryos. (insert lots of medical jargon here) I would like to transfer three embryos instead of two." RD and I looked at each other, fear in our eyes...THREE?! We expressed our concern; afterall, hadn't I proved that GETTING pregnant wasn't a problem, and he wanted to transfer THREE? The doctor nodded in agreement, but again stressed that the quality of these embryos were not very high, and in order to better our chances of getting pregnant AT ALL, he strongly advised we transfer three, "Besides," he said, "the chances of triplets are very low." Are they now?

Long story short...I really did not plan on getting into all that, but anyway...here we are - three beautiful, wonderful children, and as scared as I was at that first ultrasound, I can say with 100% certainty, I would not have changed a thing. We are so lucky and so blessed to have our two sons and daughter in our lives. A few people have asked us if we could have the same three kids, but at different times, my answer is no. I love watching them interact, getting to compare what stage they're in to each other, seeing them bond with each other, and in some ways I wonder if it's easier getting these stages all "done at the same time" so to speak, instead of having a few years between them.

Now comes those nagging questions again, "Are you having more?...Are you going to try again?...Are you done now?" It doesn't bother me because I think they're rude or because of the repetition of it all, it bothers me because I DON'T KNOW. I don't know if I want more. What answer I give you really depends on what day you ask me. As we get further and further along, it is becoming quite clear to me that RD wants more - at least one. If his desire is that strong, I feel I owe it to him to at least give it careful consideration.

"Why do you think we should be done?," he asks.

The answer to many may seem obvious, but it's not that simple. I joke, "How are we all going to fit in a car if we have more?...Vacation's going to be a b*tch!...I'll have to go out and get a job - the horror," but truth is, I don't know if I can go through what we had to go through again. Obviously, the end result was well worth it for me, but...we didn't have our family yet at the time, now we have three beautiful kids. Will my yearning for another child be strong enough to go through that again? Maybe. But after so many losses and so much pain, it feels so wonderful and so easy to just say, "We're done."

I guess we'll just have to wait and see. The thought of holding a precious little baby in my arms again....

Maybe we're not done. That's not so bad.